frogs_of_war

 I'm a procrastinator. It's a fault I've had for a long time. And when push came to shove and I felt like I couldn't accomplish something I didn't even try. Now I at least try. But I still procrastinate. I use a card to pay for medical stuff with pre-tax money and it's always been use up last year's money by mid March and get all the paperwork in by mid April. So I didn't bother looking at any of the papers they sent me. I might have needed to get most of this paperwork in by Oct last year. Oops. At least those weren't the two $800+ ones. Those don't have to be in until May.

But I cut it really close. I have my fingers crossed that they take the date documents are uploaded not the date they get around to dealing with them, because I only got the paperwork uploaded yesterday. It's been hanging over me since Jan, but my scanner is in a different room from any computer, so scanning anything is a hassle. I still have one piece of paper to go, which I couldn't get today because the office was closed. I'm going to brave the rain tomorrow during lunch to get it and hope it counts or I'll have to pay the $50 back (in essence pay for it twice, once pre-tax, once post).

I wrote a chapter of Trifecta! 

It didn't turn out how I expected and I have no idea what to do about the Fall equinox chapter. (I had planned on everyone going to an outdoor party, September is warmer and dryer than June here, but it's going to have to deal with Chloe, I think, or rather the guys deal with how Ty feels about how Flannigan reacts to the circumstances around his and Chloe's baby. She's going to be extremely careful with her little miracle, but his over-protectiveness is going to drive her crazy.) Well,  I guess I know more than I thought. All this could come out around a bonfire in a field under the stars.

I'll post the parts of this chapter after I give myself enough time to spot the mistakes. I was looking over the last chapter to see where I was and I found lots. Embarrassing.

For some reason, now that I finally got used to lj's friends feed thingy, the old friends page is back. I thought I'd be happy, but since I fiddled with the colors, I might just like the new one better. Plus I like the dotted-line-arrow-thing instead of the link for cuts. Easier to read. 

Ugh. 

I just wrote a whole post with references to things I had to look up to be correct on, and I didn't make sure my cursor was still in the message box when I went back to the post page, so when I backspaced to fix a mistake, it took me off the page. Then it offered me a draft, so I happily clicked it, but it was the draft of the last post I made not this one. An hour's worth of work, gone.

So instead of rewriting and asking a question about the story I'm working on, I'll leave you with something I came across the other day. An advice column had how to handle a relationship (the sex part) if both parties are bottoms (the answer was pretend they are making you dominate because sex is mostly in your head) and I followed the links back to another column where both parties were tops and came across this:

"I’m not super into strict top/bottom, dominant/submissive roles, but I definitely understand the natural predisposition to one end of the spectrum over the other. Going from bottom to top seems to be an easier transition, since most bottoms are actually tops in disguise (bottoms are very sneaky and also very in charge, they just don’t brag about it). But going from top to bottom seems a bit trickier, because the only thing tops are used to submitting to, relatively speaking, is bottoms, not other tops."

So I'll leave this prompt:

...the only thing tops are used to submitting to, relatively speaking, is bottoms...

 My company was recently bought by another and lots of the paperwork is different (such as scheduling, so if the two of us work, I no longer have to stay until seven) and we are cleaning like crazy to meet the other company's standards (not that we were necessarily dirty, but I hadn't ever dusted that rim of a display seven feet up). And we are supposed to be getting more hours (which would be nicer if it meant four days a week where last year it was two or three. But it means five days and 40+ hours. And coming off the holiday, I'm beat and next week supposed to be the worst yet).

I want to write! If I ignore a story too long it's hard to pick up and that's what I'm worried about with my 1001 Nights story. I already know Trifecta going to demand two days of working on it in a row get into it again. And I'm working so much that I spend my days off sleeping or getting done those real life things that have to happen. 

But really the worst change, as far as work goes is that they are moving our store manager. She found out last Monday and today was her last day (we threw a surprise going away party for her, but I had to go fill balloons for a customers just before she got there and missed all the excitement. But I went into her office before I left and hugged her. I'm not a huggy person by nature, but this was certainly an occasion for one). She helped me so much and had my back and my department's back. I couldn't have managed Floral for all those months without her.

We're told that employees at each story are supposed to be like a family (and we are for the most part), but now we're like foster kids whose parents have been changed out. (Someone told me she's feeling a lot like when her father died.) But at least our (old) manager's still down the road and they didn't move her across the state or anything)

This is a great loss to us. And it doesn't help that we've heard so many rumors about the new guy. (One of our employees who used to work at his store has panic attacks whenever she hears his voice. He never has anyone's back. He's an office dweller and doesn't lean a hand. He never thinks Floral needs as many people as we do, especially during holidays - we didn't get all we needed this last time, but the store manager worked with us for at least 60 hours that week. This guy won't) At least we get to keep our assistant manager.

So next week I go in and meet the new manager and run the department while the floral manager cleans everything top to bottom. (Days 8+ hours long because I'm doing her work and my work and without counting the cleaning, it's a seventy hour week.

My vacation's in August. Only six more months. 

 Last week I had nothing to read, then it occurred to me that that was mostly my fault. I hadn't posted anything in a while. Then when I finally got a day off and had to get a new keyboard because tea had been spilled into mine and even after it was dry, my alphabet looked like this: abcegijklmnoqrstuvwxy (before it was much worse. My A came with a friendly 4 and u opened my browser in a new window)

Not so good when the characters of my latest story are named Emirhan and Harun. Also bad for using keyboard shortcuts for undo ([ctrl] z). I've edited this story while on my lunch breaks, but by the time I got home on Sunday, it was too late to plug them in. But the major thing keeping it from being posted is that I can't figure out the end. Originally, Emirhan had a different motivation that the one he ended up with and therefore chose a different path, so when I wrote the finally few lines I wrapped up the original dangly bits, which probably aren't what a reader will worry about in this incarnation. I'm going to input all my changes and see if an ending comes to me. (a part two has, but I don't want to put in the research in necessary to write it)

Another story that has gone astray is Trifecta. I have part three of the Independence Day chapter written and all of Ty's Birthday chapter (although it is minuscule and I can't seem to pad it.) The problem is that I've been thinking of having them talk about kids, whether they want(ed) any and how there being three of them has/would affect that. Then I listen to a DecodeDC about the failure rate of birth control over the long term (50% of all US pregnancies are unplanned). Handing that off to Chloe and Flannigan would give the guys an excuse to talk about kids, plus give me a chance to write the uncomfortable grief that you might feel when something happens to someone you care about and you can't stop seeing how it will hurt you. The selfish, 'I'm so sorry that your car was totaled and you got whiplash, but how am I getting home for the Holidays now?' Or even when something good happens to them, the 'I'm so happy you got that job, but whose going to watch my kids now?' And then you feel bad for even thinking it, since whatever it is isn't about you anyway.

I'm not sure if I should toss what I wrote and try again or keep it. Maybe this section doesn't revolve as much around Chloe and Flannigan as I feel like it does and I just need an idea for the chapter about the guys' vacation. (to a place I've never been—more research...aarg!)

On a funny (plunny?) note, a guy walking through my department looked at his phone, smiled, and answered it with "Hello, Porkchop." Who would be happy to be called that?

Also, how many of us are on AO3? It occurred to me we could put all the Wizard World stories there and make them easier to read. I've been putting my stories up over there and if someone already has theirs there, I think we could link them as a series. My cat boy stories rely on their setting. And, sadly, those are the best things I've written (finished) in a while.

And now I'm home alone for the next five hours. Now would be the perfect time to write a love scene... if I was at that point in any story. 

 

 My aunt's funeral went well. It wasn't a service or anything. It reminded me more of my grandmother's 90th birthday party than a stiff formal event. I wore three-year-old capris and a buttoned shirt that had been bright pink when it was new and I fit right in. But it was still too formal (my aunt had wanted a picnic at the park and this was indoors and catered) for some of the sisters. Three (and their kids) sat it out and one said she wasn't going to come, but showed up halfway through.  That was nice for us people who never get to see her. I saw one of my uncles for the first time in about 25 years. I knew who he had to be, but he didn't look like himself. His wife though, looked (from a distance) at 50 exactly how she'd looked at 25. 

Everyone pretty much kept to themselves. I have no idea who some of them were. My daughter was slightly annoyed that many people assumed she was me (her hair is close to the color mine was growing up). People said I looked really good, but compared to what? 


Be My Queen is finally turned it. I was stressing so much about it and work that I started having panic attacks. Once I figured out what they were, they stopped being scary and were just annoying. I mean, how does this help me get anything done. My pulse would speed up (I felt it in my neck) and my blood pressure would plummet (84/42 once when I was checking. No wonder I was feeling faint even laying down). 

Between working 40+ hours a week and editing 76 hours this month and not being able to calm down enough to sleep well, I've been exhausted (I did managed to fall asleep quickly and sleep through the night Monday night. The wholesome feelings lasted about 5 hours into my 10+ hour shift. I need to sleep like that more often.) But now that the editing is done, I need to get ready for the walk through Friday. They will be executives from the company buying our company and may affect which of the two stores in town closes. But since I can't get good help (I've given up trying), every day I get off takes two to get back to how good it was, so I'm not getting ahead. Right now no one can buy the little arrangements ($20 or less) because I don't have any out. I'm supposed to have twenty at all times and thirty to forty is better. So I'm going in early on Thursday and working a 10½ hour day that gets me home in time for dinner.

I just have to hope that anything on my list got done today.

But three weeks from now I'll get at least part-time help (no more paperwork!) and someone else who knows how to design can come back part-time as soon as the HR guy answers my store manager's call. 

I just have to get through Homecoming corsage season and then I'll have a breather. The end is in sight.



 

I need names for Kenneth's parents that aren't John and Lisa (Peregrine's parents' names) but my brain is soup today. On the plus side I only had to brave the hot weather for an hour to get a half gallon of blackberries. Lots of berry are still green so we'll have fruit to eat and flavoring for our lemonade, etc. for weeks. Maybe my husband will start making ice cream again.

On the minus side I just heard from my sister that my niece's life just got more "interesting". Luckily a stranger stopped and gave them a ride to somewhere out of the 110° F heat after they got kicked out of the place they just moved to. Did some one curse that family? Stuff just keeps happening to them. Or maybe they just have bad taste in men.




Ty pressed his lips together and shook out the bed sheets. Would they need to go through the dryer to get the creases out? He wasn’t going to iron them. That would just be ridiculous.

Of course Kenneth’s parents were ridiculous. ( The better to admire you with, my dear )

 I went to a podiatrist today (this is about my injury at work). The clinic operates at 6 different centers. I gave them a day and they gave me a place. I checked Google. I could get there by bus with a little walking.

( My adventure )
My next appointment is only a block from where I work. I'm not sure which floor, second I'm guessing as the first floor is a medical clinic and much of the third is physical therapy. But at least I won't get lost.


( Work )

I sent in my story yesterday. I read the whole thing aloud first and found cliches, misspellings, clunky sentences, etc. that I'd read dozens of times before without noticing. One of the characters acquired a nickname in chapter 17. Luckily I spotted it. And my throat still hurts from the reading. Next time I'm getting throat drops first. All I had yesterday was black licorice, which worked, but isn't that suck-on-able.

Today I did nothing except follow writing & grammar links, and I found a product that will do in a few moments what I took hours to do by hand (find all the cliches, repeated phrases, proper nouns, sentence openers, etc). I'm not sure if it's worth $60, but it sure sounds convenient. I also found a page about passive clauses which taught me a few things. I really liked that they had a section on when to use passive sentences (when naming names and reveling information). I'd like to hang around a bit, but I think it's above my grade level. I can't read it and do anything else at the same time.

On a different note, I found some silky sheets 75% off and in my exact favorite color of ruby/dark pink, so I bought them and just put them on the bed. Only the bottom sheet, because silky sheets don't tend to soak up sweat and I hate to be clammy. Most of our other sheets are flannel, which is great for cold nights, people who sweat while they sleep, and anyone who likes softness, but not so good if your pj are loose. Some mornings I wake up with my pants twisted around my waist or the legs bunched up at my thighs. So we tried the sheets out. Well...

...everything slides really well. The top sheet and blanket glide over the bed. My clothes haven't bunched up. The sheets are big enough that they mostly stay on (I think I'm going to add elastic across the corners). But as I said, I'm used to flannel. On flannel your foot stays where you put it, even if you're wearing socks. Not so with silky sheets. For good lovemaking, some friction is required. Sliding around will take some getting used to. Maybe we just need more practice.

I had a really weird dream the other morning. ( Why...? )

It's been haunting me. I still want to find the answers

I have two weeks until Be My Queen is due, of which I work all but three days. I need to reread everything so I can do the obvious edits before I send it to other eyes. So that's probably why I cleaned the kitchen, deep cleaned half the living room and vacuumed all of it, cleaned and swept the back porch, and rearranged the first part of my middle child's bedroom which I use as a library/craft cupboard. A small bookshelf had sat in the slip of a space since my daughter rearranged her room a year ago.

At least my house is better off for my procrastinating. 

Title: Trifecta
Chapter: St. Partick's Day, part one
Status: WIP
Genre: Romance, Triple Slash, businessmen, jobs, friends, working
Length: 1.8k
Summary: Damien gets ready to meet Ty and Kenneth's friends

Masterlist


Damien sat in front of the vanity mirror in the spare room. Kylie rubbed his shoulders. "Are you ready?"

Damien took a deep breath. He had been out dancing in finery with Kenneth several times, but today he was going to meet Kenneth and Ty's friends all dressed up. Kylie was great and Flannigan was ok. What would their other friends be like? "As ready as I'll ever be."

( Or should I be nineteen )

I've always been the chubby one. I weighed the same amount as my older sister and she was two inches taller for most of my life. I went through puberty before she did and a lot before my class mates. I was shaped like a woman in sixth grade surrounded by little girls. And now I find out I've got small hands. I've always considered them short and pudgy, but in unisex work gloves, I wear extra small or youth. These gloves are stretchy, but it;s still weird.

High mucky-mucks came by Thursday. I tend to keep working when this happens, whereas the floral manager and store manager stopped what they were doing to show these people around, despite this being the day before the biggest floral holiday of the year. All but one of these people came by and thanked me for my work. That felt good. I don't want to be in charge, but I think I'm a pretty good second.

I'm still tired. I worked forty-eight hours last week, almost half of those hours on Thursday and Friday. Then I woke up at 5am on Saturday when I didn't have to be anywhere until noon. I slept from three to seven then ate dinner and went back to bed and slept until my alarm went off at 8am. When I got home from work, I wanted to go back to sleep. But Sunday is a family night. At least i don't work tomorrow.